Showing posts with label Ben Stiller. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Ben Stiller. Show all posts

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Day 27- No disrespect to to Lord Byren or Edgar Allen Poe, but I dont believe there is such a thing as a romantic period- BJ Novak

Hey Readers, (Clippy: IT SEEMS LIKE YOU ARE WRITING A LETTER! DO YOU WANT SOME HELP WITH THAT)

Sorry it has been so long since I've last posted. I've been really busy with pre-school school (Maybe not the best way to phrase it). I was staffing an orientation for freshman, doing improv shows, and organizing BJ Novak's show at Wash U. In case you are wondering, the show was HUMONGOUS success. We had between 3-4,000 people (more than half the school) and everyone had an awesome time.

But enough with the excuses. I need to get back to what's really important. What you all care about. Good ol' fashioned Hollywood nonsense. So, without further ado, here it is:

What has happened to "The Frat Pack?" For those of you who dont know, the Frat Pack is the group of comedians- Will Ferrell, Ben Stiller, Vince Vaughn, Steve Carrell, Owen Wilson, Luke Wilson and Jack Black that often appear in each other's movies and used to mean a big box office opening no matter what time of year it was. Now I know you're saying, "but these guys are still huge stars who can all open their own movies!" But the truth is, that none of these guys (save for this summer's "Get Smart" and last year's "Night at the Museum") have really had a BIG hit since 2006. In fact, the "friends" of the frat pack, most of the members of Team Apatow, are the ones making the big bucks. I have come up with several reasons for this:

1. The Frat Pack are making less movies because studios arent greenlighting them. In general, studios are more cautious than not, so as a high powered studio exec (say...Amy Pascal of Columbia Pictures), would you rather invest $80 million, $20 million of those dollars going to Vince Vaughn, in a big budget movie, after Fred Claus made $50 million and was considered a flop, or would you rather spend $28-$35 million on Seth Rogen's new buddy comedy or Jason Segal's break-up comedy, or Judd Apatow's baby comedy that will most definitely make more than $35 million, and therefore, will make a profit.

2. Audiences have gotten sick of seeing guys like Will Ferrell and Ben Stiller do their normal shtick. No one saw Semi-Pro or The Heartbreak Kid because they have seen those movies before. Or at least, they had seen those characters before. Jackie Moon is just Ricky Bobby + Chazz Michael Michaels + Ron Burgandy, and Ben Stiller's character in Heartbreak Kid was Gaylord Focker + Ruben Feffer (Along Came Polly) + Ted Stroehmann (Something About Mary). Step Brothers made money because it was (well hilarious!) and was at least a little stretch in that Will wasnt playing sports and didnt have a ridiculous haircut/facial hair. Tropic Thunder is working (not as much money as they hoped but still #1 two weeks in a row) because of how original it is. If these guys want to keep working, they've got to keep stretching themselves.

3. Women love Apatow movies. Apatow movies are all about relationships. They have the stuff that guys want (hilarious moments, quotable lines, dirty words, sex) and a lot of the stuff women want (relateable characters, heartwarming moments, semi-romantic stuff). Judd makes movies that guys AND girls like to watch. Why make another "You Me and Dupree" with big name actors (KATE HUDSON! MATT DILLON!) when you can make an actual love triangle movie (Mila Kunis? Jason Segal?) with smaller name actors with smaller paychecks, that people will go to see because of the positive critical acclaim and because of word of mouth.

4. Since they've gotten big, members of the Pack havent starred opposite each other (save for Tropic Thunder). People like seeing Vince Vaughn with Owen Wilson and Will Ferrell, not with Jennifer Aniston or Paul Giamatti. The movies that do well are the ones that star at least 2 of the major members of the Pack.

A couple of things I want to note about "The Frat Pack."

1. Luke Wilson should not be in it. He is in it because of Old School, and because he appeared in Anchorman, but the dude is not funny, does not make good good movies, and is not liked by men. He should be replaced by Paul Rudd because Paul Rudd is awesome and does a lot more Frat Pack stuff.

2. Steve Carrell hasnt really done a "frat pack" comedy since Anchorman. He doesnt do cameos anymore (the one from Knocked Up not withstanding) and therefore I feel like he may have left the group. But I guess only time will tell.

I have always been a fan of The Frat-Pack and actually check the excellent website www.the-frat-pack.com at least once a day so this rant is not anger inspired but rather it is constructive criticism. Here is what I have to say to each member of The Frat Pack:

Ben- I hope you continue to do smart, satirical comedy like Tropic Thunder more than family friendly fodder like "Night at the Museum 2." And you do have lots of pull in Hollywood and your own production company (GO RED HOUR FILMS! I worked there Summer 06!) so I'm sure you can find a balance between the two.

Will- As much as Step Brothers didnt have a plot or deep characters, it was fucking hilarious at parts and I like that. I hope you continue to write your own stuff and find interesting, hilarious, ridiculous shit to do.

Owen--Well you stopped making movies for a while after your suicide attempt, and I hope you are doing better, but I dont think the public will look at your carefree, silly on-stage persona the same again. We'll see how your next movie, starring Jennifer Aniston, goes. Its called "Marley and Me."

Vince- Well, your Wild West Comedy Tour bombed too, so maybe your name isnt as powerful as people think it is. However, you do have another big Christmas movie coming out, co-starring super-star Reese Witherspoon, so I'm sure that will do well and you'll get back on the horse.

Steve- You're doing just fine. But try and do more Apatow and less family stuff. Oh and NEVER LEAVE "THE OFFICE."

Jack- You also are doing just fine. I'm quite looking forward to "Year One" co-starring Michael Cera, David Cross, McLovin and Hank Azaria and directed by Harold Ramis and produced by Mr. Apatow. Keep making the good career choices, balancing smaller, more serious pieces ("Margot at the Wedding") with funny kid stuff ("Kung Fu Panda"). I just hope School of Rock 2 is going to be good....

Luke: The Wrong Brother tried to commit suicide. Stop making movies. No one likes you.

FINALLY- On a "Frat Pack" note, does Elizabeth Banks have to play to girlfriend to every single member of the Frat-Pack and its friends at one point? Lets she, she dated Michael Showalter (not a friend, but a comedian who is connected to the Frat by Paul Rudd) in "The Baxter," she "hooked up" with Carrell in the 40 Year Old Virgin (Do you like to do it yourself?), she played David Wain (connected thru Rudd)'s girlfriend in his internet shorts, "Wainy Days," she played Vince Vaughn's in Fred Claus, Paul Rudd's in the upcoming "Role Models" (which BTW looks FREAKING HILARIOUS!), and Seth Rogen's in the upcoming (no pun intended) Zach and Miri Make a Porno. Seriously, as much as I like her, its getting weird.

It's good to be back everyone.

Until Tomorrow---

PS. Here's one more hilarious BJ Novak joke: "Her body was like poetry. It bored me."

Thursday, June 12, 2008

The 6th Day- Starring Arnold Schwarzenegger

At HBO Entertainment where I work, there are several break rooms with several TVs that all play what is on HBO. Sometimes this is a good thing, and other times this is a bad thing. HBO is known for having really quality original programming such as "The Sopranos," the "John Adams" miniseries, and "The Wire," however these are only on HBO at certain points in the day. Most of the time HBO shows movies. Movies that shall we say are "less than good quality."

So while the employees are hard at work, reading quality scripts and talking with brilliant writers, sometimes you'll be walking to the break room and see something like "Norbit." This is ironic and funny because it seems like everything HBO strives for gets shit on when they broadcast Eddie Murphy pretending to be Asian. Kinda makes you think "hey, why am I working so hard if I am going to have to share air time with "Alvin and the Chipmunks?"

In any event, the other day I was walking through the break room and "Night at the Museum" was on. I informed a fellow intern of mine how they were making a sequel and he reacted incredulously. "What? Night in ANOTHER Museum? What, Night at the Air and Space Museum?" Then it hit me like Thai food 15 minutes after I eat it. What about "Night at the Museum of Tolerance!"
Imagine with me if when night fell, Ben Stiller was trapped in a museum filled with Hitler, Nazis, hatred, food deprived children, Stalin, Communists, and people who were part of some of the most horrible displays of intolerance and terror mankind has ever known? Along for the ride would be members of the new "Finding Our Families, Finding Ourselves Exhibit" which include, Billy Crystal, Maya Angelou and Kareem Abdul-Jabbar. How would Ben Stiller be able to contain and pacify them all? What would Kareem Abdul Jabbar say to Joseph Stalin?

Pretty sick, twisted idea!

Anyway--I was also talking with my friend Evan (we talk a lot) about how Jack Nicholson is crazy. It got me thinking, what would Jack Nicholson be like as a Grandpa? I bet you he'd be the coolest Grandpa ever. This is a hypothetical conversation of what its like in Jack's family.

Mom: Where's Grandpa Jack?
Dad: I dont know, he's an hour late. He said he'd be here.
Kevin (looking down): Is Grandpa not coming?
Mom: I dont know honey, I'm sure he'll come soon.
(Doorbell)
Dad: That must be him!
(opens the door revealing Jack and two smoking hot, scantily clad models--one on each arm)
Jack: KEVIN MY BOY! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
Kevin: Thanks Grandpa! I knew you'd come!
Jack: I havent missed a birthday yet.
Kevin: So what'd you bring me?
Mom: Kevin! That's rude.
Jack: Oh c'mon. The kid knows what he's talking about. Of course I brought you something.
Kevin: What is it?
Jack: Kevin, for your birthday, I brought you....(Tears off both models tops) TITS!
Kevin: Woo-HOO! Grandpa you're the best!

Anyway thats my fantasy. Until Tomorrow---